Those Aren't Pants

It seems they’ve found a way to make skin-tight look even tighter than skin.

Frankly, I approve of these leggings, because they’ll eventually be adopted by huge, broccoli-can’t-save-you obese girls who will look as though they’ve finally been punished for the black magic they’ve been taking advantage of, allowing them to cram 30 hours of DVR programming into their six waking hours.

If these start selling like the hotcakes (and believe me, they purchase a lot of hotcakes), we’ll all be able to pretend that these ladies have finally been brought to justice. Either that or it will be impossible to walk into a Coldstone Creamery without puking forever.

Submitted by babs
It’s winter: beat the blustering cold with an eggnog latte and see-through leggings. For additional protection, wear the same boots as a potential assailant who’s likely to throw you into their van as punishment for walking the streets with a visible anus.
At first I thought this classy lady might be on the way to an orphanage or a soup kitchen, but then I realized that the only charity involved in this scenario would be the sober guy who calls her more than once.

There are certain outfits that let people know how you’re expecting your night to go - this is one of them. While we can’t see the entire look, I’d wager a high amount that she’s matched her “whoever rubs their crotch on the back of them can take the bus back home with me” leggings with a “I’m staring at a glowing rectangle and tapping things” vacant stare.
(via drivenbyfashion)
She keeps her knees like that all the time because her supposed pants offer full view of her vagina and anus to anyone that passes her while she’s out shopping for shirts (read: pulling them off of boxcar tramps).

As a side note, I bet Jay Leno likes her shirt. It was probably his at one point.
(Source: everydayoutfits, via everydayoutfits)
tohellwithallthehappiness:

their my favourite leggings in the world.

Her least favorite pair have “There, Their, and They’re” printed on them.

Poor grammar aside, I hope that young girls stop wearing celestial patterns - or phrases like “shoot for the stars” will be become one of those things you can only say to aspiring pedophiles.
A galaxy is composed of gas, dust, and stars - and as the Milky Way is merely one of billions throughout the universe, it has been further hypothesized that our idea of spatial infinity may be little more than a poor garment choice, stretched around the hindquarters of fashion blogger who appears to have forgotten that fashion bloggers should, at the very least, not look like complete dogshit.

I present these photos as proof.
(Source: )
- Link
- 1 note
- 9 months ago
Perhaps if this young woman wasn’t trying to pass inside-out bean bag chair material as pants this would be forgivable, but that’s not the case. This is much, much worse.

The only way this hodge-podge of attic-wear could ever be assembled would be if closets had a shuffle button. When technology allows it, it’ll be tempting to push the button, but hold your ground and pick out your own clothing. The only cure for shit like this would be to press stop and hope for a painless demise.

Note: Some of you may be reading this with a sense of style that doesn’t see anything wrong with certain aspects of this ensemble. You may like these boots, but then again you might also like ensuring that every part of the buffalo is used after it is hunted by your tribe.
(Source: garbageisbeautiful)
Nothing is quite as enticing as the pairing of a child’s ghost costume with three layers of screen door. Place that visual treat in front of the thoughtful backdrop of kid’s bedroom paint and seasonally incorrect Christmas lights and you have what is commonly known as modern fashion, which is realistically known as the horrendous picture they’ll display on the news if you’re ever involved in a tragedy.
(Source: sillyteenagers)
Is this young woman a valet for a professional wrestler or simply a fan of White Snake? Regardless of the real story behind skyscraper legs, it seems as though 365daysofthrift is reporting that women have abandoned their longstanding program of trying. Generations of excessive primping appear to have been washed away in favor of a new look: Red Roof Inn cleaning staff on their day off.
This is our generation’s answer to War’s End Kiss, a famous photo that captured the spirit of a time in our history. However, instead of defeating an imperialistic Japanese empire, our generation has done something far greater: we’ve invented pants that allow witnesses to pick our anuses out of a lineup - and we didn’t stop there.

We’ve also found a way to guarantee that every young girl will have the ass she was to get at 50 years while keeping her seventh grade waist. It’s called, “having no goals or hobbies apart from acquiring things” and though it’s short-lived, it is highly effective.

Piggyback snacking and sloth onto teenage metabolism and the results are incredible. Twenty inch waists with Italian Grandmother asses can be seen walking into malls across the nation and scientists predict that within twenty years, this attractive look could last up to three years for a girl of moderate uselessness.

Advancement we can hope for. That’s the nature of our country: advancement and stretchy fabric.

God bless America.

Those Aren't Pants

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